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Jakuchu on Zen
and an Empty Stomach
by M. Thomas Gammarino
At my father the
greengrocers someones always askin for more coconut milk more than weve
got skies full if they could have it but if we cant they cant though
theres always more I guess ive only two arms falling out of the tree
that time i saw my shadow getting closer i spilled coconuts or apples
no it was coconuts and him hecklin head thrown back like garglin gorge
seizurin cause i was young and supple and whatnot i bit into a worm
in an apple i remember it well made two pitiful writhing segments screaming
inaudibly but he laughed again father same heckle head thrown back like
garglin gorge seizurin and him always wailin cause i perceive more beauty
in the architecture of an egg than in its profit which is all they think
about down there in the colorful realm where allve gone
utterly mad
if only i had some socks what with my feet turned purple in the snow
only speck of color in the heavens but ya know its only self craving
socks just sit darumas legs fell off a man with no form no shadow turns
into a rice pounder when he pounds rice what of wholesale greengrocers
now gone father gone only this here mountain and my frozen corpse levitating
in milk of which theres never enough always empty nothing never nowhere
like a void
no life no death though father died no rebirth no damn socks teeth chatter
like my fathers gorge seizurin hecklin no more dead like i die in fact
am dead only taking a break but even dead one oughta have socks and
sake and hot tea and theyll have yakitori tonight skewered chickens
screamin father hecklin through the ash theyll devour flesh and bone
leaving no trace of existence digesting and shitting digesting and shitting
digesting and shitting wheel of dharma manifest in
sordid
bowels
of course this itch
isnt real but still it is though itch is self so scratch is self itself
is only self form is emptiness is form is not different from emptiness
neither is emptiness different from form indeed emptiness is form in
this giant furnace they put the poor lobster in the pot cause father
likes it fresh him hecklin head thrown back like garglin gorge seizurin
and its bloodshot sorrowful eyes sad beggin for alive and empty not
dead and empty like father now boilin in its own tears shitting and
digesting shitting and digesting
shitting
and
digesting
if only i had socks
and didnt itch of course i dont and really there were probably mosquitoes
by the bo tree only milk here only milk everywhere me drownin air thin
though hadnt noticed cause itch and socks
the bastard hanging his chickens by their feet twisting their purple
faces off bodies of purity of milk but theres never enough supply never
meets demand and why should i want to deal everyday with that ito he
said this will all be yours someday bequeathing ugly transactions and
milk deficiencies and endless heaps of massacred vegetables piled up
like sores no i demand liberation demand nirvana to extinguish these
oppressive flames that burn my purple feet in the snow without socks
shitting and digesting all of us chickens bleeting upside down from
invisible purple faces father hecklin head thrown back like garglin
gorge seizurin now
dead
hearing cuckoo cry i looked up in the direction whence the sound came
what did i see only the pale moon in dawning sky melon floating in milk
empty full of nothing is the rabbit a rice pounder because she pounds
rice what of wholesale greengrocers perhaps i could marry trade fruit
for yen and liberation for little itos and a black-toothed wife no i
choose silence amidst these flames cracklin like cicadas trampled underfoot
expired like fathers eggs last week like father this week milk never
expires always more never enough rain drop as a child we made snowballs
and hurled them at one another in the grove mother screaming about
illness and dinner
perhaps i could marry
probably not
first winter rain the monkey also seems to wish for a little straw cloak
if only i had brought socks but even shaka closed his eyes suffering
cacti wilted rocks insects frozen in burning pond and beloved chickens
all dying five hundred vegetables bemoaned buddhas end himself a carrot
this flesh that hems me in too will melt is melting to pieces breaks
this putrid body all life must truly end in death so ill nothing scratch
this nothing itch just sit darumas legs fell off still but for teeth
chattering like fathers gorge seizurin mother would have insisted on
socks is she had known and packed tea too no sake perhaps i could marry
no the renunciation is great and the renunciation is final down below
the floating world of red dust colorful here only black and white snow
capped peaks like this one traced in ink on infinite empty canvas of
milk and my purple feet poor poor chickens below the villagers running
back and forth in a maniacal frenzy with arms full of nothing twisting
and writhing in samsara screaming inaudibly fathers selling greens stabbing
chickens dead like mine i did find her very attractive the way she knelt
seiza on the futami her hair silk strewn over her shoulder like death
over us all no i could not marry but myself perhaps i am sorry father
i cannot why do you haunt me so father why cant you understand fleas
lice the horse pissing near my pillow burning burning oh burning whence
came all those vegetables hadnt seen them before all piled up like a
heap of sores burning oh burning just sit i could but for the quaking
burning why do you heckle so father head thrown back like garglin gorge
seizurin air thin burning is it the mountain quakes or the rest of this
world i cannot tell father just sit darumas legs fell off but he was
not so hungry as i am hungry and burning vegetables so close by i smell
them burning oh burning burning burning why do you heckle so father
head thrown back like shitting and digesting all of us garglin heap
of sores gorge seizurin why heckle so burning oh burning shitting and
digesting all of us heckling is not different from father indeed father
is heckling oh burning precious hens roosters precious beautified chickens
remove the stakes from your eyes oh burning back away from the flames
everywhere perhaps marry my face before i was born what do you mean
why do you heckle so milk your head sores back like socks garglin gorge
itch seizurin the rain burns skin burns eyes burns nose burns ears tongue
cock my precious cock is burning and precious roosters and chickens
why heckle so you make me itch all oh burning darumas legs there swinging
from the moon wearing socks i forgot poor lonely rabbit why do you pound
no longer why heckle worms innumerable screaming inaudibly crawling
into my eyes burning do i swat them marry burning oh burning why heckle
beautiful burning chickens burning oh burning twisting writhing bleeting
burning burning
burning burning burning burning burning
burning
burning
like a void
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